What does self-healing include

Self-healing is essentially a set of personalized behaviors that help individuals sort out their emotions, repair trauma, and rebuild inner order. There is no unified standardized list—as long as it can help you slowly withdraw from a state of internal friction and pain without causing harm to yourself or others, it actually falls under the category of self-healing. There is a lot of controversy about this concept on the Internet. Some people think that only "professional" operations such as mindfulness, keeping an emotional diary, and talking to your inner child can be considered self-healing. Others think that self-healing means making excuses to lie down and do nothing. In fact, both views are a bit narrow.

I have been working as an emotional companion for almost 5 years. Last year, I met a girl who worked in Internet operations. After working overtime until the early morning for 3 consecutive months, she felt panicked and her hands shook as soon as she opened the work software. She went to a specialist hospital to find out that she was suffering from mild anxiety. She initially followed online tutorials and forced herself to sit for half an hour every day to do mindfulness. Her whole body became stiff and her mind became confused even after sitting. Instead, she was so anxious that she couldn't sleep all night. Later, I simply gave up those "correct methods" and went around to the municipal park near my home to pick up leaves after get off work. I put the sycamore leaves and maple leaves with different patterns into the old notebook I used when I was in school. I just picked them up carelessly for two months. When I opened the work software again, the panic reaction quietly disappeared. Would you say that picking up leaves is a systematic healing method? But for her at that time, it was the most effective self-healing.

Many people’s misunderstanding about self-healing is that they need to “solve something”, dig into the past traumas, and force themselves to reconcile with those who have hurt them. In fact, this is not necessary. For example, when you were a child, you were belittled by a teacher in public, and now you can't help crying when you are criticized by a leader. You don't have to slap yourself and force yourself to "why cry about such a trivial matter?" You can allow yourself to find a deserted stairwell to cry enough, go downstairs and buy a bowl of hot longan sugar water, write down the grievances that came up at the time on a note, fold it into a paper airplane and throw it out the window. This is also self-healing.

Sometimes self-healing can even be a bit "aggressive". There was a sales boy who was cheated by his partner and took the blame for the whole department. After leaving his job, he stayed at home for half a month without leaving the house. Finally, he found a shooting gallery in the suburbs to shoot for three hours. When he came back, he deleted all his previous work information. The next day he felt refreshed and submitted his resume to find a new job. He said that when he was shooting, he treated every bullet as if he was scolding the person who had tricked him before. After shooting, most of the anger that had been blocked in his heart for half a month was relieved. As long as he did not put this aggression on innocent people, this kind of venting itself was also a part of self-healing.

Many people also complain that self-healing is escaping reality. When you encounter problems, you have to solve them immediately. People who say this actually don’t understand. Self-healing never allows you to avoid problems, but only gives you enough strength to face problems head-on. You can’t ask someone who just broke his leg to run a marathon immediately, right? Self-healing is the process of disinfecting wounds and applying bandages. When you have enough strength, you will naturally have the confidence to deal with the problems that need to be dealt with.

I have seen some people heal the pain of broken love by building Lego worth thousands of dollars, some people get over the shadow of the death of their loved ones by feeding stray cats in the community every day, and some people just spend one day a week taking the bus around the city, watching the people coming and going on the roadside, which almost eliminates the internal friction of the week. If you really want to classify it, the content of self-healing can be listed in a thick book, but for everyone, the most suitable one is always the one you try out by yourself. You don’t need to follow the templates on the Internet. When you do it, you feel relaxed and the stone in your heart gradually becomes lighter. That is the most suitable healing method for you.