What are the relationships between parenting and children's health

Every daily choice in parenting essentially shapes children’s health from both physical and psychological dimensions. This impact not only covers the entire growth cycle, but even extends to long-term health in adulthood.

When I was volunteering in child care in the community, I often met parents who believed that "the child is healthy if he can eat, sleep, and not get sick." The one who impressed me most was a grandmother who was chasing after her 3-year-old grandson to feed her. She yelled anxiously after the child took two steps, saying, "You won't grow until you are full." "The results showed that the baby's weight was already 20% higher than the standard for the same month after the baby's pregnancy test. Moreover, because he had to be chased and coaxed every time he ate, and he was scolded if he didn't eat, he already had a slight eating anxiety. When he saw an adult approaching him with a spoon, he subconsciously turned his head to hide.

In the past two years, everyone has been arguing about whether raising children should be refined or free-range, and there are solid cases supporting both sides. Most of the parents who support refinement have experienced the pitfalls of "extensive feeding". For example, there was a mother who listened to the old man's advice for her first child, "You don't need to make special food supplements, just follow the adults to eat them." As a result, the baby was still suffering from iron deficiency anemia when she was almost 2 years old. Therefore, for her second child, every complementary food meal was calculated based on the ratio of iron, calcium, and protein, and she fixed 2 hours of outdoor activities every day, and her hair got stuck. Practicing gross motor and fine motor skills at the milestones of childbearing, the baby's development is indeed ahead of the same age. However, the mother's occasional uncontrollable anxiety will be transmitted to the baby. Last time the baby fell while learning to walk, the mother subconsciously screamed and rushed forward. The baby who was not crying at first was so frightened that she cried when she saw her panic. After that, she did not dare to let go and walked on her own for several days. Parents who support free-range parenting also feel that too tight a parenting environment puts shackles on the baby. I have seen two-income families ask the elderly to take care of the baby. They are not so particular. The baby eats as much as he likes after the food is ready, and usually runs around the neighborhood with his peers. Although the baby's fine motor skills are half a month slower than those of babies raised carefully, his personality is very cheerful. He can get up after falling, rarely gets emotional, and the number of colds and fevers throughout the year is half less than other babies. In fact, neither method is absolutely right or wrong. The key is not to go astray. You cannot raise your baby in a greenhouse just for the sake of precision, nor can you completely ignore the developmental signals for the sake of free-range breeding.

What many people don’t know is that the emotional response during parenting has as much impact on health as eating, drinking, and diarrhea. Previously, a mother brought her 5-year-old child to the doctor. She said that her child had recurrent urticaria for half a year. All the allergens were checked and there was no problem. She took a lot of ointments and anti-allergic drugs, but they relapsed whenever she stopped. After chatting for a long time, I found out that during that time, the couple was divorcing. They argued in front of the baby every day, and they always told the baby, "If you don't obey, your parents will not want you." Later, the couple agreed not to bring up conflicts in front of the baby, and no matter how busy they were, they would spend half an hour every day with the baby to build blocks and talk about kindergarten. Within two months, the baby's hives disappeared on their own, and even the minor problem of chewing his nails before was gone. To put it bluntly, children’s bodies are much more honest than adults, and those emotional stresses that are not caught will eventually turn into real physical symptoms.

The detailed parenting habits of daily feeding, rest, and care are directly tied to physical health. I have seen many elderly people who always feel that "children don't like eating food without salt." So they add salt and soy sauce to the complementary food they give their children since childhood, and the result is that the baby just doesn't like it. High blood pressure was diagnosed in elementary school; some parents are always afraid that their babies will freeze in winter, so they wrap them up like rice dumplings with three layers inside and three outside. The baby will sweat every time he moves and catch a cold when the wind blows. On the contrary, the baby will get sick two or three times more often than a baby who is dressed as thickly as an adult.

In fact, raising a baby is like planting a sapling. You can't just focus on whether the trunk has grown taller or whether the leaves have grown more. You must provide enough water and fertilizer, as well as enough space to bask in the sun and blow wind. Too much water can easily lead to root rot, and too much fertilizer can easily burn the seedlings. Trees grown in a greenhouse will fall down when a small wind blows. Many parents are always looking for the "most correct parenting formula". In fact, there is no standard answer. The one that can make your children eat well, sleep well, and be happy every day is the best choice for health.